From the article: Is Your Tween Ready to Stay at Home Alone?
When did you allow your tween to stay at home alone? How did you prepare your child for the responsibility? What concerns did you have and how did you make sure your tween was safe, and comfortable with the idea of being at home alone? Share Your Thoughts
Be Reasonable
- They have to grow up sometime. So yes, if you think they can be left at home, leave them at home.
- —Guest Bryanna
Be Reasonable
- Please, I'm almost 12 and I have been left alone plenty of times, for short amounts of times, let your child grow up. They have to grow up sometime.
- —Guest Bryanna
YES!!!!
- We know all the capitals of every state and you don't think we can handle an emergency!!! I'm 12 and I've been able to be home alone since I was 9, and nothing happens when I'm home! All the kids of today do at home is go on the computer and do homework! We know everyone on our street so I can come to them if there is an emergency. The first time I was alone at home I was home alone for 5 min. All I did was go on the computer in my bed. I did not even notice I was alone. My parents even let my go to the park by our house when I'm alone. You have to let your kid grow up, cause when they are older they need to get used to being alone without their parent(s).
- —Guest Kaila, a child
Age is a factor but prayer is the key
- I agree with Guess M M. Every child is different. Some may be ready at 10 while others not until much later. Remembering to put the needs of the child first is important. We will be facing this dilemma in a few years, and have already begun teaching our son about safety, planning, properly answering the phones/door, etc. It will still be stressful for us...okay mainly me! I feel he will be fine. My brother and I were latchkey children as our mom was a single parent. Building your child's self-esteem, having a plan in place and teaching them about safety is the key. And after all that, PRAY WITHOUT CEASE.
- —Guest Guest Joy
What We Did
- Our girls stayed home at age 12. We gave them a ton of rules. They were not allowed to answer the front door or the phone. They were told to let the voice message go into the answering machine. For the most part they stayed inside the house, unless a family member came over. At that time we did not have a computer in the house, so we were not worried about online trouble. Part of being a parent is handing out small amounts of responsibility at a time. Being at home alone teaches responsibility and safety. Tweens staying at home after school or during summer vacation is nothing new. Our generation did not invent this issue. However, with more working women and the economic times being what they are, it is important for parents to figure out what is best for their families. We survived, so will you. Yes, the kids are all grown up now and doing fine. They were not traumatized. Parma Parent
- —Guest Use Your Own Judgement
IT DEPENDS
- YES, SOMETIMES IT'S NOT A CHOICE BUT SOME ARRANGEMENTS SHOULD BE MADE SO THAT THE CHILD IS NOT HOME ALONE. AND YES....SOME CHILDREN ARE RESPONSIBLE. BUT...... IF INTRUDERS COME INTO YOUR HOME WHEN THE HOUSE IS UNOCCUPIED WHAT IS IT FOR SOMEONE TO WATCH AND KNOW THAT A CHILD IS IN THE HOUSE ALONE?
- —Guest http://tweenparenting.about.com
Numerous Factors to Consider
- I was a stay-at-home mom because with four kids it would cost more to hire a sitter than work. I know today times are different, the economy makes it so both parents have to work or if you're a single parent, you surely have to work. Leaving the child alone in my opinion would depend on the maturity of the child, not so much the age. How is your neighborhood? Our neighborhood is very family oriented and if I had a grandchild who was old enough to be alone, I have neighbors who are always available on both sides of my home. There are several factors to this Home Alone topic, it cannot be answered yes or no. For the mother who is so against it, perhaps she is fortunate she doesn't have to work, has plenty of money or lots of family to help out. Not all families today have that luxury. I am a retired senior citizen and raised a grandson and currently have a granddaughter and my son living with us. So I've seen it all ways. God bless all you families, it's very different from when I was a child.
- —Guest Depends
Sometimes it's not a choice
- My 12 1/2 year old daughter stays home by herself after school for about 2 hours until my husband, and I then I, get home from work. Our work schedules do not allow either of us to pick her up from school. I got her a cell phone, and she always calls me when she gets off the bus, and stays on the phone until she is inside the house. She is careful about locking the door, and does not answer the phone unless it's my husband or I calling her. I'd rather be able to pick her up from school, or just be home with her in the afternoons, but I don't have that luxury. I never leave her home alone other than that after school period. It's not fair to assume that any parents who leaves a preteen child at home alone is irresponsible, as one commenter seemed to suggest.
- —Guest L.
This is Outrageous
- How could anyone leave a child at home for a minute? How mature can an 8 or 9 year old be? They are babies and should have their parents or a responsible babysitter to love them and keep them feeling safe, if nothing else. Even at 11 or 12, it is questionable. Think!!!
- —Guest Brenda
Times Have Changed
- My kids are all adults now. However, when my daughter was 12, she supervised my younger son in the afternoons. I was working shift work, so there was a period of about three hours before my husband came home from work when she and her 10 YO brother were home alone. At the time, it seemed to work out well. However, today, when the "youngster" is in his 40s, I cringe at the "funny" (what I call "horror") stories he tells about some of the things he and his older brother got into back then. In retrospect, I should have locked the two of them up until they were 30. Although my daughter was very responsible, she simply did not have control over her brothers.
- —Guest adult kids now
Are adults around in case of emergency?
- Many older tweens may be able to handle being home alone, but having family, good friends, or neighbors standing by in case of emergency is always a good idea.
- —Guest Katherine
It depends on the child
- My oldest stayed home alone for short stays at around age 9, but my second wasn't ready until he was 11 or 12. It all depends on the emotional maturity of the child.
- —Guest M M
